


The Petty Setters

by lordmediator



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff and Crack, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, Humor, Jealous Miya Atsumu, Jealous Oikawa Tooru, M/M, Pretty Setter Squad, Pro Volleyball Player Hinata Shouyou, Pro Volleyball Player Miya Atsumu, Pro Volleyball Player Oikawa Tooru
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:08:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27465439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lordmediator/pseuds/lordmediator
Summary: Atsumu and Oikawa being petty while Hinata gets stuck in the middle of it.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Miya Atsumu, Hinata Shouyou/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 35
Kudos: 521





	The Petty Setters

**Author's Note:**

> MANGA SPOILERS AHEAD!

It all started before the Argentina versus Japan match.

“I can’t wait to see you tomorrow, Oikawa-san!”

_“Me too, Shoyo!”_

An unfamiliar voice could be heard from Hinata’s shared room with Sakusa. The redheaded volleyball player was bundled up in his blankets on his bed, eyes glued to his phone and mouth in a wide smile.

Sakusa went out, apparently having ran out of Lysol spray, which left Hinata alone in the room for the time being. Atsumu was just passing by when he heard the spiker speak with such enthusiasm accompanied by that same unfamiliar voice. Usually, it was no business of Atsumu’s if Hinata was video calling a friend—lord knows how many friends Hinata had around the world—but the ‘see you tomorrow’ part caught his interest.

Tomorrow was their official match in the Olympics against other international teams. It was a big event that all of them had been training hard for. 

“Hehe, will you stop by to say hi to Kageyama?” Hinata asked the other person.

He heard the person on the other end scoff. _“I’ll drop by for you, but Tobio-chan will have to say hi to me first!”_

Hinata giggled. “Then, I’ll introduce you to my other teammates. I’d think you’d get along with Atsumu-san.”

_“I’ve heard a lot of the other setter. I just hope he comes prepared for when I show him my own serves.”_

_Who does this person think he is?_ Atsumu snickered in his head. Then he thought about it, narrowing it down and connecting the dots and realized Hinata was talking to Oikawa Tooru, the setter for the Argentinian team they were going to face tomorrow. Hinata had mentioned him enough times when they were planning strategies against them with Iwaizumi, revealing that the two of them had grown close during his stay in Brazil.

Hinata chuckled fondly. “What is it with you setters and your serves, huh?” 

_“I don’t know, Shoyo. We’re just that handsome!”_

“Yes, yes. Oikawa-san is very handsome.”

“ _Aw, Shoyo! I knew I could always count on you!”_

Atsumu didn’t realize it sooner enough, but it was too late. His water bottle was now crushed in his hands, water dripping through his fingers and spilling onto the floor. He quickly ran back to his room before Hinata realized he was eavesdropping. He’ll clean up the mess later. 

Jealousy was indeed, an ugly, messy thing.

The next day, as everyone made their way to the main court, all dressed in their uniforms, Hinata was unsurprisingly giddy to get on court. After gawking at the huge stadium and set of lights and cameras ready to take their actions from every angle, Hinata made his way over to the other side of the court, to the team in blue.

“Oikawa-san!” Hinata yelled, arms spread out for a hug.

“Shoyo!” the setter in blue yelled back, eyes curled into crescents.

The two embraced in a tight hug like two friends who had not seen each other in a long time, which he supposed was the case. And _of course,_ that hug just had to be captured by all the cameras, and he was pretty sure was going to be broadcasted for international TV. Oikawa looked at Atsumu and Kageyama over Hinata’s shoulder, who were watching the scene unfold. Then he gave them the smuggest smirk he could while tightening his hold around Hinata. 

Atsumu was thankful he wasn’t carrying another water bottle. He really didn’t want to be responsible for another water mess. While Kageyama questioned why was Oikawa picking a fight this early on.

“If it isn’t Shoyo!” one of Oikawa’s teammates approached them, hands on his hips, speaking in English.

“Long time no see!” another one added.

“Oh, so you’re the Ninja Shoyo that Tooru wouldn’t shut up about?”

“Hey!” Oikawa squawked.

And the rest of the Japan team sighed in defeat. Of course, they should’ve expected this. If Hinata Shoyo was friends with one member of the opposing team, odds were, he was already friends with the _entire_ opposing team.

“It’s nice to finally meet all of you too!” Hinata politely greeted them back in English, beaming.

“Seriously, he wouldn’t shut up about you.”

“Shoyo this, Shoyo that,” another teammate explained, waving his hand and rolling his eyes at the same time. “It got so bad we had to limit the number of times he was allowed to mention your name.”

“Thrice per day.”

“Then it quickly became once a day.”

“Stop it!” Oikawa whined, cheeks staining pink. “I wasn’t that bad.”

“True…”

“You were worse.”

Everyone laughed lightheartedly, particularly Hinata. After the rest of Oikawa’s teammates introduced themselves, Hinata was eager to introduce Oikawa to the rest of his teammates because of course, the ginger just wanted his friends to get along, unaware of the brewing jealousy within his teammates.

“Atsumu-san, this is Oikawa-san!” Hinata grabbed the blonde setter’s elbow, taking him to meet the brunette. “The one I often tell you about!”

_IT’S HIM! ___

____

____

The two setters screamed in their heads, but their faces remained calm and polite.

“It’s nice to finally meet you!” Oikawa greeted, clamping onto Atsumu’s hand.

“Same here!” Atsumu replied, his grip just as tight, and smile equally as forced. “Shoyo-kun talks a lot about you!”

Unlike what most thought, Hinata did sense there was a bit of an… uncomfortable tension in the air. Both Japan and Argentina were highly amused by the display the two setters were putting on, so they weren’t going to stop them anytime soon, as long as hands wouldn’t be thrown.

“Oi dumbass,” Kageyama nudged him. “What made you introduce Oikawa-san to Atsumu-san?”

“Yeah, Shoyo,” Yaku agreed, standing next to him. “They both look like they’re trying to crush each other’s hands.”

Hinata cocked his head to the side, an innocent little smile on his face, as he scratched the back of his neck. “I just hoped Oikawa-san and Atsumu-san would get along…”

Hearing this, the two setters took their hands back and cleared their throats. A silent conversation passed between them as their eyes shifted between each other, and Hinata, who continued to watch them. In that moment, a momentary armistice was established. They would take their battle on the court with a net between them, and show Hinata just who was the better setter.

“And didn’t Kuroo-san and Daichi-san used to do the same thing?” Hinata tacked on in question. “They did that before our first practice match against each other and even after it! Remember how scary the two of them looked? Look at them now though! They’re such good friends!”

“That was different Hinata,” Yaku deadpanned. “That was one crafty bastard recognizing another crafty bastard.”

…

“I see Shoyo-kun every day!”

“Shoyo and I video call each other so often that my teammates make an inside joke about it!”

“Shoyo-kun baked me a cake on my birthday!”

“Shoyo baked me milk bread while I ignored all the other bread my fan girls gave me!”

“Shoyo-kun cooks me my favorite meals every time I ask ‘cause I can’t cook!”

“We get it. You’re both assholes,” Sakusa declared, scowling at the two setters who kept bickering back and forth over who had Hinata done more for. 

The two slowly wilted, not without receiving a warning glare from their respective trainers. Hinata’s face was flushed red by how much the two kept talking about him, as well as being very confused as to why they felt the need to argue about it so much. He loved the both of them, and admired their skills, and would always be willing to make stuff for them so long as they asked politely, so _why?_

“Are they really Olympic athletes or are they just being petty?” Komori asked no one in particular.

“They’re being petty,” Iwaizumi answered, the urge to smack his childhood best friend for his antics resurfacing. But he was on the opposing team and Iwaizumi was not his trainer, so he’d direct his anger towards Atsumu once he stopped fighting with Oikawa. “Unbelievably petty…”

It was the end of the match, Argentina had won. And though defeat tasted as bitter as it always had, it meant something to Iwaizumi, Oikawa’s friend since childhood, to see the both of them come so far. He was both happy and proud of him. They may have never made it to Nationals in their high school days, but look at where they stood now. 

After the match, came the usual shaking of hands and respect of each other’s skills and sportsmanship. Atsumu even went as far as to say, “you weren’t as bad as I thought.” Which in Atsumu talk, that was a very high compliment. Iwaizumi, along with the others thought that would be the end of that. 

But then Hinata happened.

“Oikawa-san, you were amazing,” Hinata praised, sweat still sticking to his skin, but still managed to smile brightly. “The next time we meet in an official match, we won’t lose!”

The brunette had been expecting those words. “Yeah. Wouldn’t have it any other way, Shoyo.”

And then the two embraced each other again, for all the cameras to record. Some awed at the two volleyball players who obviously valued their friendship. Some just wanted good shots of the aftermath of such an intense match that left both teams sweating like never before. Either way, it was a nice scene. Two friends from opposing sides, both so close before and after the mach.

“Incidentally, my team wants to invite you to our post-match celebration, Shoyo!” Oikawa smoothly continued, flashing him a toothy smile. “And let me tell you, Miguel was really impressed with you!”

“R-Really?! Your middle blocker?!” Hinata gasped, eyes going wide with wonder and astonishment at the prospect of eating with the Argentinian National team. 

_Oh no…_

Before Iwaizumi could do anything, Atsumu was already stomping his way over to them. 

Which was how they found themselves in this predicament.

They were just lucky all of them moved to the lockers and the two setters weren’t caught in their verbal battle for the entire world to see.

…

Kuroo knew this was a terrible idea.

Which is why he did it anyway.

“And you’re saying the aliens would like you more than me?” Oikawa shouted, bug-eyed, teeth clenched, and hands on the table curled into tight fists.

“Obviously,” Atsumu answered, flipping his hand and non-existent long hair.

It was a mere coincidence really. 

He didn’t know Hinata had agreed to take Oikawa around the city to show him what he missed since leaving Japan, with Atsumu tagging along. He wasn’t sure if it was out of spite or simply because he didn’t trust Oikawa not to make a move on Hinata without him there. He was betting on the former.

Also, Kuroo just wanted front row seats to the mess he caught a glimpse of from TV during the Olympics. 

And now, here they were, in a random bar sitting with two professional volleyball players, while Hinata went to the bathroom. Kuroo was just in the bar by coincidence and ran into the three of them. Hinata being Hinata, invited him to sit with them, and the two setters of course didn’t want to upset him, so they agreed. Luckily for all of them, Kuroo was acquainted with the two enough for things not to get awkward.

He had no idea how their topic of conversation shifted to aliens though.

“Bullshit!” Oikawa screamed, slamming his hands on the table. “What do you even know about aliens? What would you even say to them?”

“I’d ask them not to probe me,” Atsumu replied, smirking as if he just gave the smartest answer to a question the teacher just asked.

“That’s it?!” Oikawa raged. “You wouldn’t ask them about their technology? Or why they hid from us for so long?! Or why they don’t want to share any of their cool alien tech with us?! How about—”

“Woah, I see you got Oikawa-san to start talking about aliens,” Hinata came back, hands stuffed into his pockets, sitting between Oikawa and Atsumu. “If Oikawa-san didn’t love volleyball, I figured he’d be an astronomist.” 

“Shoyo, listen to this! This jerk said that if aliens kidnapped us that they’d—” 

And Oikawa proceeded to reiterate his story of how they got into the argument in the first place. It became clear Hinata’s input wasn’t necessary since the two of them just kept going back and forth, fighting over who the aliens would and wouldn’t probe, as well as who could negotiate with the aliens better if they planned on harvesting their organs for research.

“Kuroo-san,” Hinata tapped him on the knuckle, just as he took a long sip of his beer. “How many drinks did these two have?”

“I’m pretty sure Atsumu-san already downed two glasses of beer and is on his third one. And I think that’s Oikawa’s second glass?” he pointed to the brunette’s half-empty glass of beer.

Hinata rubbed his face, his smile dropping. “Oh no… Oikawa-san is a lightweight.”

Needless to say, Kuroo learned many things about the two setters that night. 

Some things he didn’t need to know, some he was just glad to be a witness to, because where else would he get the chance to see two professional volleyball players argue over who could dance the macarena better and get Hinata to be the unwilling judge of it? Oikawa was apparently the loud, ranting type of drunk, and Atsumu—though more of tipsy—wasn’t going to let Oikawa outshine him, so he went along with whatever ridiculous impromptu contest they came up with.

“Oh, pleeeaaase!” Oikawa slurred, his cheeks pink, and his posture slouched, supported by the arm wrapped around his waist, courtesy of Hinata. “You call that dancing? Shoyo can dance better than you, _Atsumu-chan!_ ”

“Shoyo-kun,” Atsumu’s jaw dropped, turning to the redhead. “You never told me you could dance!”

“Well, I—”

“Oh yeah!” Oikawa interrupted, enveloping Hinata in tight hug, squishing their cheeks together. “When we were in Brazil together, Shoyo took me to all the best bars in Rio, and he _killed_ it on the dancefloor!”

“Oikawa-san, you’re exaggerating…”

“No, I’m not!” he shot back. “Do you have any idea how many creeps stared at you whenever you danced? I had to keep my eyes peeled because who knows whose bed you would’ve ended up with if I wasn’t there to shoo them away?”

Kuroo flicked his eyes to Atsumu, expecting the blonde to snap at Oikawa for such an intimate display, but the blonde looked more… intrigued.

“As expected of Shoyo-kun!” Atsumu pushed Oikawa’s face away, settling his elbow on Hinata’s shoulder. “You are a blessing sent from above! Not only are you perfect in every other way, but you seduce everyone in the room with just a swing of your hips!”

“Atsumu-san!” Hinata squeaked.

It seemed Atsumu was the shameless flirt type of drunk. 

“For once, Atsumu-chan, I have to agree with you.”

“Oikawa-san?!”

“Shoyo is so beautiful, his smile is capable of melting the icebergs in the Antarctic! He’s like a highlighter that makes you want to look at him and not take your eyes off of him.”

“And the way his eyes shine both on and off court, ready for a challenge but ready to have fun is like a two in one package.”

By this point, Kuroo took out his phone and began recording everything and anything they said because how could he not?

“We should make a religion out of Shoyo-kun.”

“Yes! We already have plenty of followers! I know just the right people to make the statues to capture Shoyo’s beauty!”

“And I know just where we can erect the shrine!”

“No! T-That’s going too far!” Hinata fumbled with his words. “You two are _not_ making a religion out of me!”

After some more scuffling and arguing over who the leader of the Hinata Shoyo religion would be, Hinata was able to shush the two of them long enough to exit the bar, lest the two of them would do anything wilder and consequently ruin their social image, and Kuroo helped by making sure all three of them got home safely. And by safely, he meant stopping the two from continuously dropping the dirtiest pick-up lines. 

Yes, their new contest was who could do the better pick-up line.

“Shoyo-kun, you’re so hot, my zipper is falling for you.”

“Shoyo, roses are red. Violets are fine. _You be the six. I’ll be the nine._ ”

“What is a nice person like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?”

“Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of me move without even touching it.”

“If I was the judge, I’d sentence you to my bed.”

“Do you have room for an extra tongue in your mouth?”

“Shoyo-kun, _do you want to sleep with me?!_ ”

“Shoyo, I can fuck you better than this guy ever could!”

And they continued on until they managed to grab a taxi for them, much to a spluttering and tomato-faced Hinata’s relief.

When Kuroo got to his own home, he sighed with relief, and finally, busted out laughing until his stomach hurt, while he sent the videos to Kenma.

And the highlight of his night, had to be his best friend’s reply.

“How dare they think they can be the leader of the Shoyo religion when _I_ would clearly be the leader.”

…

“Do ya need glasses? Kid can be a bit bright.”

“Psh, I’ve known him for years. I’m used to it.”

Iwaizumi really wanted to smack both Oikawa and Atsumu. 

Hinata had changed teams and was now part of a Volleyball team for Brazil. Atsumu stayed with the Jackals, along with Sakusa and Bokuto, but kept in contact with Hinata. Kageyama was part of an Italian team, Ushijima with a Polish team and Hoshiumi was the only one who stayed with the Adlers.

It was a strange thing for all of them to be gathered here again. Kageyama and Ushijima formed a strange bond since their time in Adlers together. They seemed to agree on a lot strange things, namely, their love for food with rice, conspiracy theories, and that the world is flat.

Ever since the Argentina and Japan match, there seemed to be an unspoken battle between Oikawa and Atsumu for Hinata’s attention. Even now, as all of them met up and agreed to have dinner together at a restaurant nearby, stuffing themselves in one of the booth, the two of them fought with Hinata settled between them. Though, the redhead seemed more indifferent to the two setters’ shenanigans and preferred just letting them be. 

“Atsumu-san and Oikawa-san are getting along so well now!”

Never mind. 

“ _This_ is getting along to you?” Sakusa questioned behind his face mask.

“And I’m just saying,” Oikawa ranted, holding up his phone, showing a picture of a younger-looking Shoyo wearing a very familiar-looking blue and yellow jacket. “That Shoyo in a blue oversized jacket is cuter!”

“Not that I’m disagreeing that Shoyo-kun looks hella cute in a blue oversized jacket,” Atsumu responded, holding up his own phone to show a picture of Hinata wearing Atsumu’s Jackals jersey. “But Shoyo-kun looks much better in dark colors!”

Oikawa’s breath hitched in horror as he stared at the photo. “You got Shoyo to wear your jersey?!”

“Oh, that,” Hinata nonchalantly chimed in, peeking between the two. “I was in charge of laundry that day and got our jerseys mixed up. Sorry, again, Atsumu-san.”

The blonde waved it off. “I told ya, it’s fine, Shoyo-kun.”

The redhead giggled. “It’s so nice being here with all of you again. Isn’t this great, Oikawa-san? I’m so stoked!” 

He turned his head to the Argentinian, only for Atsumu to take the opportunity to twist his face up in disgust and flutter his fingers in a mocking gesture towards him.

Oikawa though, was anything but capable of maintaining a straight face, despite the light twitch in the corner of his lips. “Yup! Totally stoked, Shoyo!”

“Can you believe we’re all really here again, Atsumu-san?” Shoyo turned to the blonde, which was the perfect time for Oikawa to flip him the bird, as well as scrunch his noise down at him condescendingly. 

“Yeah…” Atsumu said, an overly sweet smile to match his overly sweet tone. “Who would’ve thought!”

…

“—so I need to know what people in Brazil call their soulmate so I can properly confess to Hinata how I feel!”

Atsumu was very caught off-guard by Kageyama’s sudden request for some love advice. More importantly, was Kageyama really not aware of the literal war that had been going on between him and Oikawa for the past few weeks now? Was this setter an even bigger idiot than Hinata? But… Kageyama did come to him seeking advice. And who was he, but a good friend, here to help a fellow setter?

“I got you, Tobio-kun,” Atsumu wrapped his arm around the shorter man’s shoulder. “Listen to me, I got the perfect plan on how you can confess to Shoyo-kun.”

The next day, Atsumu had to call it a setter day because there was literally no other way to describe it. Oikawa came to Hinata's apartment as expected, but Kenma, Hinata’s popular youtuber friend and also a former setter, came to hang out with him as well. And he was pretty sure Bokuto mentioned something about Akaashi coming to see them.

“Hinata!” Kageyama called out to the spiker, who was standing between Oikawa and Kenma. The ravenette setter presented a pink, heart-shaped cake to Hinata, with a four-letter word written on top in icing in a darker shade of pink. “You are my _puta!_ ”

Silence engulfed the room. Kageyama fidgeted where he stood, blushing. With the gall to look like a young high school boy about to confess to his crush. 

Atsumu was the first to break the silence, doubling over, howling in laughter. Kenma and Oikawa followed suit, joining Atsumu in laughing at the absurdity of Kageyama’s confession. Hinata stared at the cake in utter confusion. His brows arched down, and his lips slightly parted, like his soul just left his body. 

Taking notice of this, the other three setters cleared their throats and directed their attention to Kageyama, though they were still wheezing from how much they were laughing.

“TOBIO-CHAN!” Oikawa heaved.

“Apologize to Shoyo!” Kenma demanded.

“What did I—”

“Kageyama…” Hinata began, a shadow over his face. “Is this really how you see me?”

Kageyama blinked. “Well, we’ve known each other for so long… I’ve always kind of seen you as this.”

Hinata made a pained noise, clutching the fabric over his chest, as he scowled at the taller man with watery eyes. “KAGEYAMA YOU IDIOT!” He screamed, turning around and running away from him.

“Wait, Hinata! Why are you—” Kenma showed him his phone which displayed a Google translation of the word Kageyama used on his cake and just called Hinata. His eyes blew wide with dread, and his jaw slacked. “OI, DUMBASS! I-I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT! IT WAS A MISTAKE!” He chased after the redhead, his foot already in front, but it turned out, he didn’t need to run far.

Akaashi stood chest to chest with a tear-eyed Hinata by the doorway, one hand held tightly onto the ginger’s waist, while the other hand patted his head comfortingly. Noticing the other setters’ eyes on him, Akaashi looked at them pointedly—particularly at Kageyama, and gave the coldest glare he could muster.

“Come on, Hinata,” Akaashi lead Hinata away, hands placed on his shoulders. “Let’s meet up with Bokuto and I’ll treat you to ice cream.”

The other setters were left dumbfounded. 

“Keiji-kun, you’re so unfair!” Atsumu raced after the pair.

“I always knew Akaashi was just as sly…” Kenma muttered, following Atsumu.

“Hey! Don’t just leave me! Shoyo!” Oikawa stomped his foot and ran after them.

“Wait! Atsumu-san, this is your fault!” Kageyama hollered after.

“Oh no you don’t, Tobio-chan! It’s totally your fault why Shoyo’s upset now and Akaashi stole him from us!”

“No, it’s not!”

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't have the best week, so I just wrote this fic to cheer myself up, so this was very self-indulgent~ 
> 
> Scenes inspired by gaysony, vn_vannies, liann1009, painacotta, and samiponyu's fanart on Instagram!
> 
> Hope you stay safe wherever you are in the world!


End file.
